Big Issue, Ladies

Something Mark Haddon, author of The Curious Incident of the...you know, that one, said in the paper the other day struck a chord with me. Like my late friend Siobhan Dowd, he'd written a book with a central character who has Asperger's Syndrome – which, to quote Siobhan delightful term, is "like having a brain that works on a different operating system from other people's". Haddon said he wished he hadn't allowed his publishers to put the word "Asperger's" on the cover, because it then became an 'issue book', and he found himself constantly protesting "it's not really about Asperger's, it's about difference. It's about acceptance of others. It's about that sidelong, Martian view of the world." (Would it have made any difference to people's perception of Curious Incident if the word 'Asperger's' hadn't been put on the cover? Personally, I doubt it. I think maybe Haddon should trust his readers a bit more to 'get it.')

Now, the last thing in the world I want to write is "issue" books. Perish the thought! The very term conjures up the image of an angry, frustrated teacher with greasy hair haranguing their class to "PAY ATTENTION NOW,  while I tell you something IMPORTANT, OK?". Argh; heaven save us from Worthy Folk Imparting Knowledge! I just want to tell a cracking good story.

HOWEVER I also think this: you're damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't. Not highlighting 'issues' has problems of its own.

I was recently at a publishing party and I mentioned to a well-known (male) author who shall remain nameless that I tackle some pretty big issues in my books, and he quipped, 'what? Like choosing which dress to wear?' Something tells me this author hasn't actually read any of my books; he's making assumptions based on the undeniable girliness of the covers.

So here, just for fun, I've mocked up some alternative covers for some of my titles – just in case you were wondering if my books really were about anything else besides choosing a frock:

OK! That's that cleared up, then! Any questions, see me at the end of class.

Incidentally, speaking of Siobhan Dowd: as it's Easter and you might be wondering what to do, I may as well remind you that the stage play of her book-that-features-someone-with-Asperger's-but-isn't-'about'-Asperger's, The London Eye Mystery, brilliantly adapted for the stage by Carl Miller, is on in London NOW – but be quick! It closes on April 18th.You can read Culture Witch's piece about it here, and Bookwitch's piece, which I'm linking in spite of the fact that it includes an extremely unflattering picture of me, here. Below is a picture I took at the (belated) launch party, of Siobhan's sister Oona (mother of the nephew who inspired the book!) with actors John Cockerill (Ted) and Samantha Adams (Aunt Gloria):

Oh, and another "incidentally": for reasons I can't divulge without giving the plot away, Toonhead is the perfect read for Easter. We're in for a cold, wet one, so curl up in front of the fire with a nice Fair Trade chocolate egg (see what I did there? Issues!) and read this.

And finally...

Jinx update! If you're a fan of the program, do join the Jinx Facebook fan page! We're hoping there might be a second series.

Good Intentions







This is how most of my emails and letters to fans begin:

'I'm really sorry it's taken me so long to write...'

And it does; it takes me ages. So I'm writing this blog as a general grovelling apology to all of you who are currently waiting for a reply/did wait a long time, then got bored and went off me completely/are now twenty-seven years old and not really interested any more. It's still January, just (have you ever noticed how January lasts approximately three times as long as the other months?) so I will stick my neck out and say I'm making a New Year resolution to get up-to-date with my fan mail, and stay that way. There, I've said it. No going back now: I'm committed.

Here are some other bad habits I'm going to ditch: eating cake, sleeping at all the wrong times of the day, eating cookies, avoiding stuff, drinking Champagne, and cheating.
















Still on the subject of mail, a recent one (I'm going to answer soon, really I am!) says:

"I was wondering if you were going to write a book , that actually is The Apple Star. I think that it would a good idea if you wrote it because, I for one who likes the Lulu Baker Trilogy, definitely buy the book. Just an idea I had. Tell me if you like by replying."

Big thanks to Whitney Duggan from Australia for this question, as it reminds me that I also need to update my FAQs. Because this question comes up a lot – Whitney, it's a great idea: so great in fact, that many other people have also come up with it! Including me. For anyone vague of memory, or who STILL hasn't read my Lulu Baker trilogy (you haven't?!), let me explain: The Apple Star is Lulu's magic recipe book. I 'quote' from it frequently throughout the trilogy, though of course the book is a figment of my imagination (though I also get mail from readers who ask where they can buy it, so I'm quite flattered by that!) The recipes are also made from ingredients that don't exist.

I would have fun writing such a book – though I think I would want to team up with a researcher. But, lovely idea though it is, my publishers have yet to be convinced. Maybe if the Telly Thing (see previous blog posts) becomes a big success, leading to massively increased sales of my Lulu Baker books – maybe then they'll think it's worth doing. So I'm not giving up hope. Of course, if I DO write it, it will be necessary for me to experiment with lots of cake and cookie recipes. In fact, I'd better get in practice now, just in case, and taste them as I go along.

Lots of people ask me HOW I write. They ask me WHERE I write, and if they don't know me from a hole in the ground, they might even ask me WHAT I write. But one question that doesn't tend to come up is WHY I write. Which I suppose is fair enough: it might seem a bit rude to ask that, as if they're saying, 'what do you want to go and do that for?' or 'must you persist with that annoying habit?' But it is a question I sometimes ask myself, and at this point I find I have noticed a pattern. Going over the seven novels I've published to date (I'm cheating slightly here, as I'm counting the one that's out in May, Tiger Lily Gold. Break out the Champagne!) it seems that I write about stuff instead of doing it. So with the Lulu Baker books I was writing about cake instead of baking; with Toonhead, I was writing about art instead of drawing, and with the Silk Sisters books I was writing about fashion instead of creating my own designs. All things that I'd like to do, but which I've been channeling into my chosen art form, because I can't be a celebrity chef and a great artist and a famous fashion designer. Oh, or save the world from corporate greed (there's quite a bit of that in Silk Sisters too).

Whew! I'm exhausted just from thinking about all that, so I think I'll have to go and have a lie down.

I know what you're thinking: isn't she going to lead on to what's coming next? Gosh, is that the time? I've got to go.

Erm. You may have spotted some broken resolutions along the way here. But I PROMISE you, I won't break the one about answering my fanmail :-).

Jinxed

As it's taken me so long to get around to blogging, there's a whole broom cupboard full of Stuff That Hasn't Been Blogged About Yet. And I realise I've never told you about the telly thing. So now, here it is:

The Telly Thing

Actually you see I haven't mentioned it because I was waiting for the Telly Thing to happen. Which it hasn't. Except that a pilot was made.

No, not that sort of pilot; the sort I'm talking about is a single episode, so that one bunch of telly people can show it to another, richer and more powerful bunch of telly people, to help them decide whether they want to make all thirteen episodes or not. That was, um, six months ago. And I've just had some news (drum roll): the big, rich, powerful telly people concerned (that'll be Nickelodeon to you and me) have...

...still not decided.

I had been waiting for news of an actual decision before telling you about it, in the superstitious belief that if I mentioned it any earlier, I would jinx the whole thing. Then I realised that me, my editor and my agent would all look like this if I waited that long:

So I'm telling you about it. And hey, who knows? Perhaps talking about it will make it happen! ANYWAY, I suppose I should mention what sort of telly thing it is. Well, first of all, it's loosely based on my Lulu Baker trilogy. I say loosely, because it's not actually a dramatisation, it's a sitcom version, and they've made quite a lot of changes. Here's a publicity image:

Note the title! I wonder whether we'll have more luck if they change it? That's Lulu on the right, by the way. And the lady on the left is Aunt Cookie. No, don't go rushing to your bookshelves, trying to remind yourself of who she is; she's nowhere to be found in the books! But in the Telly Thing, she's a sort of magical chef-type lady who springs out of Lulu's recipe book.

So there you go; that's the update. I've had a lot of readers ask if a Lulu Baker movie will be made...well, this, so far, is the nearest we've got. So no Cameron Diaz or Queen Latifah yet, alas! (see my FAQs if that makes no sense to you).

I also sometimes get asked if there'll be a film of Toonhead. And I reckon you could do something really interesting with that, along the lines of Who Framed Roger Rabbit, or Space Jam.


It's about time there was another live action/ cartoon animation movie, if you ask me.