Yule Blog
(saving the best bit till the end, so DON'T MISS IT! Scroll down...)

I was looking for a nice Christmassy picture to put here, and came across this, which made me giggle: I especially like the 'too dumb to win an award' sticker. Looks like a fun stocking-filler.

So, what have I been up to? Well, I've been going to the dentist a lot.

 I could make a career out of going to the dentist. By the way, the above drawing lives on the wall in my house, along with half a dozen other vintage artworks by MOI. They are drawings I did for a magazine called Punch; this one is from a column by the late Miles Kington called "Let's Parler Franglais" – which is why I put in a caption in Franglais, a language he devised that could be understood by almost anyone who failed GCSE French (trivia: Kington was invited to join the Monty Python team, but declined).
Occasionally I have been allowed out of the dentist's chair long enough to go home, jot a few barely intelligible sentences on my computer, consume baby food and even go to other places like Winchester and Oxford. Because of my fragile dental state, my dentist arranged for me to be looked after by a tall bearded person whenever I ventured too far. It was very nice of said bearded personage (henceforth 'Beardy') to provide this service, as he was paid only in Chunky Kit-Kats (hmm...I wonder if my dentist is looking forward to some more fillings...?)

 

 OK, some of you are smart enough not to be fooled by the above and will recognise recent winner of the Roald Dahl Funny Prize, Philip Ardagh, seen above at the SCBWI conference in Winchester, where I was a guest author (my first ever grown-up talk! To grown-ups!) and he was the hilarious after-dinner speaker. Lots of other authors were there too, including Meg Rosoff, who revealed that when she first became a 'children's author', someone told her that she would now have to 'put on a big necklace and go round schools'.  

The other picture featuring Beardy was taken at the Kids' Lit Quiz National Final in Oxford, where there were even more authors, among them Mary Hoffman, Alan Gibbons, Julia Golding...oh, far too many of us than it is wise to cram into one room (find out more here), and Harry Enfield. The kids were a very brainy lot indeed, and it was a close-run thing; congrats to the kids of Wheatley Park School, who won.

One of the teams in the final was from Cockermouth in Cumbria, which was recently in the news because of the terrible flooding there. Another fellow author, Chris Priestley, has been persuading lots of us to contribute signed copies of our books, so that we can do our little bit to help replenish damaged library stocks in the area. He was hoping to get the whole thing done in time for Christmas, but the flood was very inconsiderate and didn't schedule its arrival well enough in advance to make this possible. But the good news is that Chris' initiative IS going to happen – in the New Year. And possibly – though I don't want to jinx it – a very well-known TV show will get involved in the appeal as well...watch this space. Meanwhile, a very happy Christmas to all of you in the flood-stricken area, and I do hope that life gets back to 'normal' for you soon.

Last, but by no means least! My friend Candy Gourlay is going to fill a new website with recommendations for really special independent booksellers – because she is worried. 'With only a few big players left in the bookselling market - Waterstones and the supermarkets,'  says Candy, 'our reading culture which is enriched by diversity and choice is under threat.'
So: here is my contribution: 
Readers of past blog posts will not be surprised to learn that my choice is the wonderful Big Green Bookshop in Wood Green. It's still only a baby – not even two yet – but is blessed with the knowledge and startling charisma of one far older. This is because it is run by two guys – Tim West and Simon Key – who have 35 years of book selling experience between them (that's Simon in the picture, with Horrid Henry). They set up shop after the last chain bookshop in Wood Green – where they worked – closed down. A brave thing to do, but the passion and dedication they bring to what they do is second to none. They wanted to offer:
 'The kind of bookshop that we’d like to visit ourselves...with a thoughtful range of titles, friendly knowledgeable staff and some cracking gems that surprise and excite us'. 
Exactly what I look for in a bookshop! They also have a very amusing blog.

It is a general bookshop, not a specialist children's one, yet their calendar of events (of all kinds as well as children's) and their involvement with local schools is truly impressive. Here are Simon's own very personal current favourite children's books (at this particular moment in time):
'The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle - A simple gorgeously illustrated picture book that I loved as a child and that is a clear favourite with my own daughter. She loves pointing at all the bad things the caterpillar eats before he gets a stomach ache.

'Olga Da Polga by Michael Bond - This in my opinion is a much better series of books than Michael's more famous Paddington Bear and follows the exploits of a rather extraordinary Guinea Pig. The stories in it are gentle and heartwarming, and it's a great bedtime read.

'You're a Bad Man Mr Gum! by Andy Stanton - This is a work of absolute genius. Andy Stanton has managed to write a series of books that adults and kids find equally hilarious. Very much in the vain of Roald Dahl, but with a modern twist.

 'Speaking of Roald Dahl, Danny Champion of the World is a book I read at least once a year. A magical story asbout the relationship between a boy and his father, who leads a secret life...As a story for boys, I'd say this pretty much tops anything.

'The Riddle of the Poisoned Monk by Sarah Matthias. Time travel, murder, mystery, fantastic characters and a hugely entertaining page turner for children aged 8-14. Written by Sarah for her own children, I devoured it in one sitting, and was left wondering whodunnit right until the end.' 
'Our customers are a real mix, which reflects Wood Green's demographic,' says Simon. 'Most people that come through the door are extremely well read and keep up with the latest reviews. We have particulary strong children's and literary fiction sections and also do extremely well with books on local history, which suggests there is an enormous pride in living in Haringey [the local borough].' 
Hurrah for booksellers who really love books, and know what they're talking about. Merry Christmas everybody!

Three Christmas Wishes

Season's greetings and all that stuff. I'm finally starting to feel a bit Christmassy, and doing a spot of shopping and general faffing. In return, here's what I would like for Christmas:

1. I want Woolies not to close. Here I am being a complete hypocrite, for two reasons: firstly, I hardly ever shop there. I just want it to be there, because it's always been there, and I'll miss it if it goes. It's the place I go to for Seasonal stuff: those Lindt bunnies at Easter, emergency picnic plates in the summer, Halloween masks in October, and in the winter nice cheap Christmas wrapping paper. Besides, I find it hard to imagine a world without Pic`n'Mix.

The second reason is that it's all my fault they've got into financial trouble, because one Saturday afternoon in 1973 I nicked some Outdoor Girl eyeshadow from one of their stores. I'm sorry.


2. Still on the subject of shop closures (these are hard times!) I want no more independent bookshops to close. And let's face it, if we don't all make a point of buying things from them, they might. We recently lost one in our neighbourhood, because its landlord decided one day to multiply the rent by three. It closed several months ago and guess what? The shop is still empty. Well, that's doing a power of good to the neighbourhood, isn't it?

We NEED independent bookshops. The best ones become a hub of the community, like the Big Green Bookshop in Wood Green does, by inviting local authors to hold book launches in them, give readings to kids from local schools and that sort of thing. Bookworm and The Children's Bookshop are also great for children's events. Hurrah for them!

The greatest ever shop of this sort was the Turret Bookshop that used to be on Lamb's Conduit Street, WC1 (and previous incarnations as well, but that was before my time). Here are some of the people who were regulars there: Carol Ann Duffy, Satoshi Kitamura, Ralph Steadman, Brian Patten, Christopher Logue...and plenty of star-struck nobody hangers-on like me. As you will know if you've checked out my website, I did get to have a book launch there all of my very own (18 years ago!) but the only people who came were my mates, who I then forced to buy copies of my picture book, even though they didn't have any kids. Or know any. Ah, happy memories! Long may there be booksellers with the wit and imagination to do this sort of thing.

3. I want plenty of music. Christmas carols, all that stuff, I love it. Bring on the sleigh bells and the schmaltz. The three most-played albums at Christmas time in this household are:

Elvis Presley, The Wonderful World of Christmas
His Merry Christmas Baby is, without a doubt, the best Christmas song ever.

Bach Christmas Cantatas
One word: heavenly.

...And the one I'm going to tell you about now. For four years, from 2002 until 2006, a friend of mine and her husband got together and wrote and recorded some Christmas songs, which they then sent out in CD form to their friends. Alas, 2006 was the last year as by Christmas 2007 my dear friend was dead. Her name was Siobhan Dowd and in her short life she shot to literary stardom with her novels A Swift, Pure Cry and The London Eye Mystery; Bog Child was published posthumously, and Solace of the Road is out next year. I'm not going to give a biography of any sort here, but do follow the link to read more about her.ANYWAY: lots of people know about her literary talent, but far fewer know what a great singer she was. So go and take a listen to these songs; I'm sure they will brighten your Christmases as they have ours. Floating Snowflakes, in particular, brings me out in goosepimples. I was too sad to listen to her voice last Christmas; this year I definitely will, and raise a glass in her memory.

Merry Christmas!

Let's Get A Norther In

It's a strange job we do, us Northers.

We spend vast amounts of our time all by ourselves, inventing stories and seeing no-one except the man who runs the corner shop and the postman. Then every once in a while, people called Literacy Coordinators start noticing that there's a lot of Literacy about that wants Coordinating, and they gather the other teachers around them and say, 'It's about time we got a Norther in.' And the other teachers say, 'Yay! Good idea; a morning off!'

And then comes Children's Book Week, and you're somehow meant to get all excited about some Norther coming in that you've never heard of. And the Norther will stand there and yammer on about 'I remember when I were a nipper' (they talk like that, Northers) and they'll say things like 'writing is really hard, girls and boys, but it's well brilliant, an' all!' And you're thinking, 'yeah, whatever; I wonder if there'll be sausages for lunch?' And the Norther will say, are there any questions, and you think, might as well ask something, so you stick your hand up and say 'Where'd you get your ideas from?' And then the Norther will say something or other, but you're busy thinking, chocolate pudding. I wonder if there'll be chocolate pudding?

What? It's not like that in your school? Ah, that's because you've got a really GOOD Literacy Coordinator. I met some really good literacy coordinators this week, I'm glad to say. There was Alison Oliver of Farrington's School in Chislehurst, Kent. She was completely FAB, brainy and well-read. And she was incredibly nice and tolerant while I was pacing around like a lunatic during morning break and lunchtime, trying to be a Plumber-and-Electrician Coordinator and failing dismally. The girls were great, too. Here I am with some of them:


Notice how, without knowing it, I dressed in almost the same colour as their uniform...

Then it was off to The Big Green Bookshop which, as anyone in the vicinity of Wood Green knows, is run by two beardy booksellers and literacy coordinators of almost legendary status, Tim and Simon. The shop turned into a Tardis for the morning, somehow accommodating about sixty kids plus me and Simon and several teachers (Tim wisely decamped to Stamford Hill). Here I am with a couple of the kids of Nightingale Primary:


No, their uniform does not involve vintage 1950's sequin jackets; Fifi is wearing an item I brought along for a bit of fun dress-up. Just because I thought it would be fun. And because my Silk Sisters books have a bit of a dress-up theme to them (they also have a sort of surreal futuristic dystopia thing going on, but that doesn't lend itself so readily to props). I've always loved dressing up; let's face it, everyone does. You can't really see, but young Imaani on the left is wearing a very OTT necklace of mine.

Finally, there was Jackie Harding of Cromwell Community College in Chatteris, Cambridgeshire. There was a lot of cramming went on there too, but the admirable Ms Harding handled the squeezing of approximately 5,000 pupils into a library space roughly the size of a ping-pong table with humour and aplomb. Here I am with some of those pupils, after they'd somehow unpacked themselves from their confinement:

(Again, note the similarity in colour between their uniform and my sweater. Something's going on here, but I don't know exactly what...)

Some Northers I know – OK, authors – would regard three locations and six talks in a week as fairly routine, but for me that's quite a lot of getting out and about. I have since crawled back into my shell. But I did have a great time meeting the kids from all of these schools;many of them asked really thoughtful, interesting questions, and I'm glad to say that not one of them said, 'where'd you get your ideas from?' Though I can't vouch for whether any of them were thinking about sausages and chocolate pudding...